Friday, April 11, 2008

What kind of sick person are you?

Recently, here in our lovely home, we underwent a string of coughs, colds, ear infections etc. etc. etc. Even I who rarely actually come down with illness in my adult years caught a cold which didn't hurt but diminished my speaking voice to a hoarse whisper (not of course to be confused with the horse whisperer, a movie I didn't understand getting the attention it did.)

Now that we are all relatively on the mend (only two more days of antibiotics left for Liana) I am reflecting on my children and their personalities, and trying to remember what I was like as a child.

I know I was a dramatic child inside, when I was little I envisioned coming down with some mystery ailment that would be tragic yet beautiful. I always felt guilty if I had to wake my mom in the night because I had done something silly (like throw up on my pillow), so I would dream of an illness so terrible that it would justify the care I needed and everyone would feel sorrow and pity for me, and give me constant attention.
As I grew up I became more of an escapist, I wanted to read or watch TV, not talk or be with people. This worked against me, as I usually get sick only at important times, when I am actually supposed to be the center of any attention, like during the run of a show where I actually had speaking lines, or of course, right before my wedding.
I like to deny being sick as well, I remember in High school waking up to realize my left eye was swollen shut and saying to myself, I just need to splash a little cold water on my face and I'll be fine The pictures of that show tell a different swollen pink-eye story. When I was doing a run of Romeo and Juliet" in Thousand Oaks, I had laryngitis, I couldn't talk all day, but somehow thought I would be fine once the curtain went up. Of course I started coughing so badly in one scene, where I was supposed to be crying, that the actress playing the nurse actually left the stage and brought me back water and held me patting my back as I finished out my dialogue. (the local reporter thought it was planned and actually mentioned it favorably in his review -go figure, maybe if I had been sick more I would have landed more roles!)

In my current role as Mother I don't get to be sick, oh sure I may not feel well, but it seems unless my own Mommy is visiting I don't have the luxury of lolling around in my bed or on the couch. Those places are usually crowded with small people of mixed ages needing their noses wiped, or warm juice to drink (yuck!)
My girls seem to deal with illness differently, one is a drama queen, pointing out any little scratch and fretting about it constantly, even if it turns out to be marker, or a piece of food. One likes to shut down, and sit there, staring around her with soulful eyes not wanting to leave, but not wanting to participate in conversation etc. Then there is the baby who is so sweet I didn't even know she had an ear infection till the doctor told me at her routine check up. The amazing thing is, even though I get tired I never resent giving them the kind of attention they need, I realize I didn't need to feel guilty for waking my mom, it was part of her job.

So I am curious, what kind of sicko are you? If you are ill, what comforts you?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm just like you. I don't get to be sick. Even when all I want to do is lay down and take a nap, that is not an option. For some reason, Scott can when he's sick though. Somethings just not right with that is it?

Dianna said...

I'm so sorry for all of the sickness, including your own. My friend Catherine insists that it should be impossible for moms of little ones to get sick.

I agree that it's part of our job to clean the vomit off of the pillow, but it can be doubly sad if you are sick yourself. When Sophie had a stomach flu shortly before Thanksgiving, I was still dealing with pregnancy sickness. I felt so guilty when, as I tried to reassure her and then stifle a gag while running a bowl of vomit to the bathroom, Sophie moaned, "I'm sorry you have to deal with gross things." What a heartbreaker!

My deepest condolences on the R&J story at Kingsmen. It must've been horrible! I would that I could've prepared you large quantities of hot, soothing liquids. But, hey, who doesn't enjoy a great review?

Jannah said...

Christie, ah yes, the division of labor seems unfair quite often. Oh well, maybe once all my children are in school I'll get a sick day - either that or I'll have bake a dozen something for the bake sale or finish a paper mache volcano etc.

Dianna - I often tell my littles that they are lucky they are cute, it keeps me from quitting. When I was sick Ella gave me foot rubs.

Dianna said...

What a sweetie that Ella is! I love when Sophie attempts to give me back rubs. For a long time, she'd just grab my shoulders and start to shake me back and forth. That was a backrub.

Have you ever successfully had a daughter play with your hair without pulling out a big handful? I haven't. :)

Jen said...

I like to pretend I'm not sick . . . unless of course my husband becomes sick with a mild cold and takes to his bed for an entire weekend (why is it when they actually do have sick leave, they don't take it but rather stay in bed all weekend when you were just hoping for some assistance finally?) It is then that I start complaining loudly about all my ailments I've been concealing and how I don't have the luxury of lying around in bed all day as someone has got to take care of the children . . . what a big fat whining martyr I am. I remember when we were dating and I used to take such good care of him when he was sick. Somehow, after years of inequality in sickness, the romance of it is gone. Am I a bad wife?

Anonymous said...

there seems to be an unsaid rule in our marriage that whoever complains first about getting whatever the kids have gets to be the one who is sick. I like to claim it so that when Matt gets sick I can just say, "yeah, it sucks to be sick...it was so hard being sick and taking care of sick kids too." That can be my final pity for him without much more of me being required.
Overall, I do get everything the kids get, but milder. We all get to be sick together and I love all the snuggles on the couch and the change to block out the world and just be us...movies, naps and blankies. There was one sickness this winter that really hit me and left me barely awake for an entire sunday...matt kept the kids out of the bedroom (they were also sick...he came down with it a few days later) and my dear friend brought him dinner since the rest of us were throwing up and not eating.
i believe in rolling up the carpet, assigning covered couches and handing out the buckets! Then sit down with the remote...

-mary saunders